Everyone has an opinion - It doesn't make it true!
As a dog owner, you’re no doubt familiar with the scenario - you haven’t necessarily asked for any advice about your dog but you’re offered it anyway. And if you have asked, well… the floodgates open and everyone is desperate to share their thoughts and experiences.
Whilst I’m certain that all of those keen to share their wisdom mean well and do this with the very best of intentions, there is a problem. Not all advice is good advice.
Let’s take someone I was speaking to today, for example. She is due to collect her puppy soon and has been given an advice leaflet by the breeder. So far so good?
Sadly, in this case, the guidance was to leave the puppy to cry alone in a crate for 8 hours overnight and to just clean up any mess (ie. allow them to soil themselves in there) when you go down in the morning. It says that, this way, the puppy will learn to hold it overnight because they don’t like being dirty. Instructions are given to totally ignore the puppy’s vocalisations and reassurances are given to the new owners that they should not feel guilty about this, as the puppy ‘has to learn’ and that this is the right way to go about it.
It goes on to give more truly awful, potentially harmful (and certainly unethical) advice on a whole range of matters, along with some factually inaccurate ‘information’ about dog body language.
To be honest, I can’t even bear to read it all. It brings tears to my eyes just thinking about it.
Well, this breeder might be great at her job (breeding dogs) but that doesn’t equate to giving good advice on raising a happy puppy. In fact, the guidance given clearly demonstrates that, whilst she may mean well and may have lots of experience of breeding and living with dogs, her understanding of canine ethology and emotions is sadly lacking. Either she doesn’t know about the research into these issues and what the most up-to-date guidelines are (in which case she shouldn’t be giving any advice on those subjects) or she is choosing to ignore, it in favour of her own views and opinions founded in goodness-knows-what (certainly not science!)…. in which case she REALLY shouldn’t be sharing any advice on the matter. Either way, it’s a problem.
The poor new puppy owner is then left wrangling with conflicting advice from different sources and unsure who to ‘believe’. Well, it’s not a matter of belief - it’s a matter of fact. This is not about ego (I couldn’t care less who gives the information, as long as it is good information) - it’s about scientific research… data gathering… education.
Now, I’m not suggesting that breeders should not give their new puppy owners any advice. And I also know very well that there are some truly fantastic breeders out there who give brilliant guidance. Some are qualified and accredited trainers or behaviourists. Take Jane Arden (dog trainer, breeder and Smart Pup Box Creator), for example. Others have just taken the time to keep up to date and be open to learning so that they can support their puppy’s new owners to have the best start in life. Either way, I am truly grateful to these people - I hope the new parents of their puppies know just how lucky they are.
However, in this case, the advice is outdated, unethical and, carries an increased risk of the development of behavioural issues. I wish I could say that this is a one-off but it’s not. It happens all the time.
It’s not just breeders either. Every day, my clients tell me about (usually uninvited) input from people who think that they know best.
You know the ones.....
On a walk, another dog rushes over to greet yours and they don't look too comfortable. When you say that you'll move on with your dog, the other owner tells you that there's no need because the dogs will just 'sort it out' themselves and that theirs 'needs telling off' anyway.
You mention to a person that you meet in the park that your puppy is really mouthy and bitey at the moment. They suggest that you tap your puppy on the nose every time they do it and it will 'soon stop them'.
Your adolescent dog gets over-excited in play with another dog, who is in the care of a dog walker. The dog walker tells you that your dog was being ‘dominant’ and ‘needs to be castrated’.
You're working with your anxious dog to help them feel more comfortable around other dogs. When you ask an approaching owner to call their dog away to give yours some space, they respond by telling you that your dog is only like that because you're clearly nervous yourself, whereas their dog has no such problems because their dog knows that they are the 'pack leader' (Ugh!!).
Your puppy is chasing your children. Your neighbour tells you that you need to 'nip it in the bud’ by pinning the puppy down ‘to show them who is boss'.
You mention in a Facebook group that your dog growls at you when you approach him while he's eating. Numerous people tell you that the best thing to do is to keep taking their food away from them 'to make sure that they learn to accept it'.
Your puppy is repeatedly bowled over by someone’s over-enthusiastic and boisterous adolescent dog. When you try to move away with your pup, the dog's owner tells you that you're teaching your puppy to be scared of other dogs by doing that.
Oddly, the justification that most of these people give for their advice is that 'they have had dogs all their life', as if this somehow qualifies them. Well, having teeth all of your life doesn't make you a dentist.
Please don’t become someone who looks back in a year’s time and wishes that you hadn’t followed the dubious advice which was given to you. Ask yourself:
Does this ‘feel’ right? Would I be happy to follow similar advice in relation to a child?
Do I know where this idea has come from? What evidence (not just anecdotes) is there to support it?
Whilst the person sharing their thoughts means well, can I trust them as someone suitable to advise on this?
Are people whose life’s work it is to understand and be educated in canine behaviour saying the same sort of things?
It breaks my heart that so many dogs will suffer because of their owners inadvertently following damaging advice. It also saddens me that so many owners of dogs with problems are filled with regret, when they have the benefit of hindsight.
Lovely to meet you!
I have seen the power of a truly proactive and personalised approach to puppy raising and training and want to share this with the people that need me most: new puppy owners and those planning to bring a puppy into their family. I’d love for you to be one of them.